Wednesday, April 26, 2017

toning it up + postpartum bod, the second time around

Howdy! I know it's been a while -- I always seem to start posts and never finish them (but I read a ton!). I've been slightly drowning, slightly keeping my head above water trying to balance momming two, wifing one, owning and running a business, answering mail, planning a newborn sip & see and then a second birthday party, managing a household, and trying not to destroy the house every time we make headway with cleaning it.

One thing that's been majorly on my mind recently is my physical health.  I was seriously ill the last few months of pregnancy, which meant I was perpetually tired and looking back, really thin (while I definitely didn't weigh less, I had a 9.5lb baby and a huge placenta in there, and you can see in my face/arms that I was drained of any nutrition). It's honestly hard for me to gauge what I actually look like / how my body is at any given point of time until time has passed and I can look back in photos. (Is that super weird?) It's kind of like I have body dysmorphia on a micro level. Maybe just distorted awareness?

Regardless -- I was really ill and highly medicated in pregnancy, then I had the baby and got a lot better, but had to re-adjust to eating with non-pregnant T1D. Every time I have a baby, my diabetes gets worse (my pancreas just takes a beating), so although I WAS diabetic after Lilly I didn't have to be medicated for it yet, and this time I'm still definitely diabetic (and a little more so than before), so I DO have to be medicated.

The first few weeks of post-baby life were spent eating ALL THE THINGS, because I could finally eat and also I was producing beaucoups of milk for baby (and have an oversupply in the beginning, so much to compensate for). So I would bake a batch of lactation cookies and eat the whole thing by day 3. I had several milkshakes (they were damn good), several slices of carrot cake, a billion batches of pumpkin oatmeal muffins, and basically all the carbs (with some healthy fats and a lot of protein too). Now that my milk supply has evened out to just produce enough for AnnaCate, I've tried to take a step back from "I MUST HAVE ALL THE THINGS!" when eating and approach my diet from a healthy standpoint (admittedly means the all-day chomping on dark chocolate and going through a Pound Plus dark chocolate bar from Trader Joe's every week is not the best call for me)... especially since my blood sugar levels have been creeping higher and higher and higher as I eat like this. (No shock there!)

Not to mention, my lack of exercise (from lack of energy) has taken a toll on my strength / physical ability / muscle tone. I never really got strong after Lilly (I did get toned and skinny, but I wasn't as flexible or agile as I was in the height of my consistent yoga practicing days). I want to feel confident and beautiful in a swimsuit, as well as physically capable and healthy, energetic and vibrant. 

Before baby, my stomach was always a place that I rarely held much fat and tended to show muscle tone quickly. Obviously pregnancy will do a number on abs -- but fortunately my skin has enough collagen that it bounced back pretty darn well after Lilly. I've had to work much harder at getting it closer to "normal" this time, fearing I had serious diastasis recti this go-around, but my doctor confirmed my lower abdominal pooch is just some leftover fat and skin that I have to do ab exercises to get rid of. (Whew!)

My goals are to strengthen my body, find energy again, eat a clean diet that helps me control my diabetes as best as possible (with as minimal medication as I can manage), and work on toning up my body overall. My arms, back, booty, legs, and abs can all do to have some firming / muscle tone and strength brought back (or brought, period, in some instances -- I've always neglected my back and my legs are a challenging area for toning).

My plan right now is to eliminate refined sugar from my diet (I was eating way too much!), cut drinking alcohol down significantly (such a bad habit to have a couple glasses of wine most nights during the week!), temporarily cut out gluten and most dairy, and focus on eating good, wholesome foods (mostly plants!) to figure out what works sustainably for me (ummm.. I'm not giving up dark chocolate forever!). I also am trying to do the Tone It Up Bikini Series exercise plan but honestly it's a struggle for me right now, since I'm still sleeping in so late in the morning and I accidentally smacked Lilly in the head with a dumbbell when I tried to work out while she was awake yesterday (horror!!!!! She is okay, though!!!!!). I need that energy to come in so I can get up early and work out, and get a grip on my day!

I would love to have a healthy mentality where delicious plant-based foods are my mainstay diet, with occasional treats that I can thoroughly enjoy. I honestly don't get full satisfaction and JOY out of eating dessert twice a day every day... how can you enjoy something if you get too much of it?! I also don't particularly ENJOY a damn good glass of wine anymore since I drink it so often.
{Sidenote: how precious is my little mini?}

So that's where I'm at! I'll be checking in at the end of May, and again in June before we leave for our weeklong Charleston beach trip -- sooooo excited for that!